There is so much to share. And some I feel is not mine to share, so I won’t. There is so much that happened in such a short amount of time, miracles even. There is also a lot I have not taken the time to share in the last couple months that I feel is important. But for now, I will focus on the present, breaking my normal patterning of needing to catch up linearly first.
It started on a Tuesday with a Moments with Marybeth session. There was a time I questioned if I see what is going to happen, or if, by my words, I change the reality and then it happens. I understood it was both, depending on the situation. Tuesday, I became more aware of the energy, the authority, I step into, when I am creating reality. I acknowledged it. I said, “Yes, I am willing,” while I was in it.
I also became aware of the channel as I stepped into it and spoke from it. Again, the ability to do so is not new. I remember twenty years ago calling it “teacher mode” that I would step into, or when I spoke and saw the reaction in the other, I knew to tell them those were not normal words for me, please know they were meant for you. My understanding is I have access to many channels, like tuning into a radio station with a dial. It always “just happens”, but Tuesday, I was more conscious of the whole process. It was such an exciting session for me! I am becoming more aware.
Wednesday through Sunday was a planned trip abroad, meeting three friends who play in Moments with Marybeth, and another one who has dipped his toe in to play. That became the first retreat I have run. Another word for it, from a specific modality called Clairvision, is an intensive. It was interesting to me, because although we had some ideas what we wanted to do or to play with, there came a point before I arrived that I knew this was going to be a working space for me. And so, it was.
One of the participants was more agitated than I have ever seen or heard him. From a light space, or a knowing space, I knew we needed to shift that. I asked if he would like a Reiki session. We agreed to that night or the next morning. There was a moment I “needed to” flow my love through him. I felt it as a torrent, like sitting him under a waterfall. We were sitting around a campfire and I got up and just wrapped my arms around his shoulders and rested my head on the back of his neck. Then, I think I laughed and asked permission, “Is that okay?”
I saw, lightly, what needed to happen. I have become so present. It is simple. It is fun. Yet, it is significant. He also had a belief from past experience that he snored too loudly to be close to others. I saw that needed to change, at least for our time together, as I am normally a light sleeper.
Four of us were camping. As I settled into bed that first night, I sent out an energy for each of us. It was for him to have the experience of not snoring so he would know it is possible. And it was for all of us to have the best night’s sleep, whatever that means.
In the morning, I “knew” I wanted to stay in bed until he woke up. Maybe I wanted to do the Reiki I had promised. I do not remember why. I just knew. After a while, one of the others came down to check on us and offer breakfast. One of the other campers shared that as she was having a hard time falling asleep, she felt the “Marybeth sparkle energy” envelope her and she knew she could let go, receive, and just fall asleep. And so, she did. I think that was a first for me, or close to a first. I do not do that often. But I saw what needed to be done, and each person has worked with me long enough that I felt very comfortable to just offer it energetically. It was amazing to be validated without asking. I am not sure I would have even remembered I did it without her words. Hmm… maybe I have done things like that more than I am aware. In any case, it is a new observation, a new experience for me, and it really felt good.
In that time, the one I was waiting for woke and spoke to me for a bit. He shared some of what had been going on in his sleep space, including being told Reiki was being done on him, and he felt I was holding his hand. I asked a couple questions and I understood he was deep in a process. It started to rain again and with the sound, he stopped talking. I knew that I didn’t need to physically be there anymore. When it stopped raining, I headed up to the house. On the path, I felt I could leave because I was no longer needed. By the time I got to the road, I knew that was not accurate. As I walked further away, I knew part of me had stayed right there with him. I understood I expanded my beingness so I could hold the pulse of that space without having to be there physically. That was definitely a first!
That day I spent in one-on-ones with the others. Some talks we wished we had recorded. Some, I think we actually turned on a recorder to capture it. I did a Reiki session for one of them. I think it rained on and off. Maybe it was the weather, but I was aware that there was nothing to “do.” All the activities we had talked about just didn’t want to happen.
I one point, I went back to check on the one in process. I understand those. I call them “deep dives.” When they first started for me, I thought it was surgery of some type. I would get really heavy and have to be really still. It was easy, but I had to play with it mentally for a bit to become comfortable with it. I sat on my bed. I opened a channel telepathically. [Note: I have never said that before. Maybe never done that before. But as I look at the sentence, I don’t know how else I could describe it.] I just asked if he needed anything. I didn’t want to bring him back. But I know in those states, I can find a way to communicate if I do need something. After a short bit, he breathed loud enough so I could hear him. That was all the movement. I understood that to be “all is well,” so I stayed a few moments more and then went back to the others.
I won’t share his experience, but it was a game-changer. When he awoke and joined us again, the agitation was gone. He used the words that he was at peace. He shared the neck ache he had been carrying was gone. From our perspective, he was awake and moving in perfect time to start clean up the campsite to leave and to be part of the ceremony. From my perspective, I was able to hold that space with ease and knowing. The result, his story, was amazing.
One of my recent stories I have not shared here yet was this willingness to step into my inner shaman, to take people on journeys, amongst other things. And so, it begins.
The second day when we woke up, I knew he was past the deep process and was now “just” sleeping. It was lighter. I felt such a different energy greeting us. I shared that with the other two and we all talked for an hour or so. Things were moving that day. There were things to do.
One of the things we had talked about before was a short walk to a 9th century St. Mary’s Church. I knew I needed to go there that day. I could not commit to anything after that. Three of us went, plus the dog.
We were talking logistics on walk there. As the church came into view, my attention shifted immediately. I stepped into silence. I looked around the church and yard. I decided to walk clockwise around the church to get to the front. There were two piles of cut grass in the front yard. I walked the perimeter, noting a nearby gate, and then noticed a structure up the hill, back in the direction we came from. There was a tree on the hill that really got my attention.
I stood in the grass facing the tree for a bit. I walked up the steps and tried the doors to the church, but it was locked. The others were sitting in silence by this time. I could not bring myself to sit by either of them. Still on the stone outside the church doors, I turned back around the corner and saw the same tree again. Again, I stood facing that direction. There was noticeable energy that direction.
Eventually I sat on the church wall, cross-legged, so I was facing the tree. I closed my eyes and went deep into a meditation. I felt my spine straighten. My fingers went into a mudra. Twice I caught myself nodding off and the second time I decided to lie down on the wall as falling either direction was not a good option.
Again, I went deep quickly. I don’t know how long I laid there. I heard the most beautiful singing / toning. First, I wondered if I was hearing something from a past-time. Then I had a memory and knew one of the others was in the church. Then the commotion started. An older man came to collect some of the cut grass. He brought with him a number of dogs, all smallish, about the same size as our dog, all barking.
I noticed I wanted to remain lying down. None of them were my dogs. It got very chaotic. I heard dogs growling on both sides of me at one point. I had a thought of safety, and knew I was fine. Part of me felt maybe I should care or do something to help. Part of me just wanted to laugh because it felt absurd to me to not engage or acknowledge it all.
One of the women shared with me earlier the story of a difficult past life in that area. I heard her comment that the man and the dogs were from that past life. Even with this continued chaos, and the knowing what this was bringing up in her, I noticed I did not respond to her or try to assist. I let myself be in my space. I don’t remember at what point I sat up. I do remember seeing five agitated dogs barking from in front of the gate. This was directly in front of me.
When I was sitting up, the other woman was at the gate in front me. I do not remember if the dogs were still there. But it is where they were. She and I caught eyes and I could feel energy engage. I held her eyes as I allowed and watched the energy. Something was happening. I think one of the feelings was waiting for, or expecting it, to not take too long. I heard the words at least twice. “It is done here.” Meaning it is complete. Something in this energy is complete. “Here” referred to time and space. It goes back at least as far as the past life. It rippled out into the land.
But when I heard the words, the energy was not complete. I knew I did not want to move yet. I just let the energy move through me. A couple times I needed to close my eyes, but I didn’t want to lose the connection with her either so I would open them again. There were three long intentional out breaths. I remember the energy flow did not release until the man was out of my sight. Most of the dogs were, too. Maybe one was left. At some point, we were complete.
I remember saying I wish I knew what we did. Also, maybe I’m good not knowing what we did. There was a lot of laughter from me.
I think I started talking about the line I was on with the tree. She pointed out the stump of an older tree that was in front of it. That felt significant.
I continued talking. I saw our precision timing in coming to the church. I saw we came on this trip for these moments. We were on a “Mary” line, even if it was not called that. We were at an acupuncture point. Just as when we are ready as individuals to let go of something, then we can see it and do it. This land called as here now because she was ready to release this energy she had been holding. It was ready to clear.
I saw that the energy of the dogs stirred up that chaotic energy. That gave us the opportunity to release it with attention. And we did.
Practically, the man was there to bag up some of the cut grass. Energetically, he incited my friend, at a minimum, to clue me in on what this was about. He also incited the dogs to bring that energy to the surface to be released. It was so perfect. I could see the three of us walking home arm in arm.
I heard a quiet voice suggesting that I just made that story up. I chose to tell the friend that assisted me that I heard the voice but chose to not validate it. I allowed this to be a first for me. I am not sure I have ever done anything like that in this lifetime energetically. Certainly, I never saw the story afterwards, like the land piece or the energy/dog piece.
We spoke for a bit. Eventually we went into the church. As we entered, I walked around the church, doing the thing with my hands, letting them move. I noticed the walls or the church was not receiving it. Not consciously, but in hindsight as that recognition was another first. So, I changed to sending sparkles of my love as an offering for the space, no imposition.
Then we three sat in a row together. Such precious moments. The one with the knowledge of a past life there acknowledged we had just done something significant. She told us what happened for her.
Afterwards, we looked at the writing on the outside walls by both sets of doors. The geometric ones were the ones that drew me it. I touched all of them. I felt the Egyptian hieroglyphs, except these were not Egyptian. I was aware I left my mark in hieroglyphs in the past.
We did walk away from the church arm in arm. It was the energy of celebration.
Later, doing a house clearing, (another story of synchronicity) I felt what my hands were doing was writing hieroglyphs or letters. Another person watching me said they saw a language. Oh yes, light language. This is the first time I felt it that way.
The next day, when we were all together, we did what I call a calcite ceremony. Again, as I looked at it, I could see how to create it. We did it in two parts, one for us and one for the land.
Every time I felt we were complete energetically, or I felt my work was complete, more opened with someone. We could not quite make sense of where our space was that we rented for the night. A beautiful dog came and just sat with us until we were set. Our last morning together, we did an impromptu speaking and recording each of our stories. We missed breakfast altogether.
My plan was to sleep on the plane as I had a long drive home after. Several synchronicities later, including our flight being delayed, and I found myself in conversation, a significant conversation. The first piece was he validated by his own experience that he had not understood until we talked, that the earth, the land, really did change when we did that energetic work two days prior. He also shared much of that area had just gone through forest fires about three months back. That felt significant in the preparation work that had been done to ready the land for the changes. Honestly, it was a first for me to have a real conversation like that on a flight. Things are changing externally, such beauty, such precision, such quick validations.