Actually, I really love me. I feel so good today.
Today started with attending the first day of a 3 day retreat with a Tibetan Buddhist, Lama Khentrul Rinpoche. It was my first real introduction to Buddhist beliefs. It was interesting watching my thoughts with the prelude to my thoughts as he presented more. I saw again that I am “much further along” than I give myself credit for. Or maybe, most are and teachings are just getting behind. So many things that he said were “the way it is” the foundational truths for all, are simply not my truth. Yet, I could see where he was coming from. And some pieces that made perfect sense to me I am not sure I understood if I did hear them before.
At lunchtime, I knew I didn’t really want to continue the retreat, but I had just started talking to one of the women and knew there was more to connect with with her. She is beautiful, and so different from me. She wears a tail as she is half-human, half-feral, intentionally true to her wild side. I went back downstairs to speak with her and she asked if I would come into Glastonbury to have tea sometime as she would like to introduce me to more people. She shared that a friend of her, age 20, just committed suicide. I know there was a recent 19-year-old male suicide here recently also. She talked about people, young people, feeling separate and needing community. And I have been reminded recently to go out into Glastonbury and observe what is needed here. And I heard her when she spoke. I know this is a place I can assist.
At the same time, where I have been recently. Wonderful synchronicities brought me to lead my first “group energy sessions.” Events leading up to it told me it was my debut and was significant. The houses on both sides of us have come up for sale and we are looking at purchasing one or both, and the feel behind it is creating community. And just yesterday we put out flyers in 19 doors around us letting neighbors know about the event we were putting on. The feel behind that for me was “We are creating our community.”
This cat-woman and I really connected, and we both knew it. She did her wild-woman-call, I am sure there is a better name for it. And I did my clapping. It felt good. We will be an interesting pair if we work together.
I decided not to come back for the second half of the day. I understand that may cause some eyebrows to raise, and I could have stayed, it was fine, but you know what? It felt really good to decide not to and to look at what I really want to do these next two days.
Then I went upstairs to assist a delivery person. He had to wait 10 minutes before I could sign for the packages. He asked me about the event, and then kept asking questions. I was in such a good mood that I shared from that space of feeling so good. I shared a bit about what I believe and how I play. He had to ask me what “play” meant to me. He had such a big smile on his face the whole time. At the end of our 10 minutes, he told me I am very deep, and he had to give me a hug before he left. It felt like we were really good friends.
I really do like me.