Once I let go of trying to make the Kundalini Yoga work for me, I found an Iyengar Yoga teacher 3 minutes from my London home. I have gone to two classes and she is really good for me – exactly what I was looking for.
Yesterday’s class was excellent. I was a bit tired before class, but I noticed how excited I was once I was walking to class. I want to say my body was excited, but here I would like to say I am starting to differentiate between my physical body and my energy body. It was my energy body that was excited, but that woke up my physical body, too.
During class, I went very deep into some of the postures and into the breathing. I felt postures I have done before in a new way. And I noticed how excited I was, whatever part of me, by the end of class. Yes, I clapped – it was overflowing and had to be expressed.
I also noticed for several hours after class that there was something a bit out of balance. It was not full-on motion sickness, but I did question if I had tapped into that energy again, just lighter. I just noticed it. I held a light curiosity. I did not go into the question or into the feeling.
This morning, as I was in conversation, I let my body move as it wished to. This is not new. As we discovered in yoga yesterday, I often sit in yoga “poses”. And I have been allowing this spontaneous body movement for at least months. It is normally stretches or arm exercises. As the conversation was completing, I started jumping, legs out and then in. As the intensity of that increased, I added my arms so I was doing jumping jacks. Then something shifted in my arms. It might be they were now moving opposite in comparison with my legs from what they were before. And then I felt the side muscles working. And I played in this exercise and just noticed it was different from previous experiences. I was more engaged in the exercise itself. And I was really just observing my body and allowing it to do what it wanted. There was no thought to initiate.
I thought that was cool, so I went to share the experience with Rick. As I did, I noticed I was sitting in a position that I have never been aware of being in before. My feet are never on the ground when I am sitting. They are up, They are crossed. Or one may be on the ground, but on the balls of my feet. And now as I observed myself, I was in a very relaxed, comfortable, aligned, alert posture. I could sit like that all day. There was no pressure anywhere. My back was perfectly straight. I could feel the alignment of the chakras. And my feet were flat on the floor, the sides of my feet were touching, and my knees were apart.
As I wrote that I realized that we stand with our feet together like that in the new yoga classes. I think that may be new to me. At least it has been a new awareness of standing that way.
As I sat there and spoke for a couple minutes about the posture I found myself in, I could feel heat and a stirring in my root chakra. I have not felt this in a while and noticed and commented on that also. I feel like progress is being made. Well, I know progress is being made. This is new. I went back to work and played with the new sitting posture. I noticed that it was not as perfect.
Later I recognized the perfection and the energy of those early moments. I had things to do. That was spontaneous, not planned. So I went back to work out of habit. But I think this is more important. Going forward, I would like to make a new habit of staying with the energy and let it build or morph on its own. This is the kundalini energy I was looking for from the Kundalini Yoga. It is just there.