Interesting times right now – well, always, yes?
I am still writing here because occasionally someone replies and occasionally someone I am speaking to mentions they enjoy my words. It is easier to journal – then I don’t need to think about how someone may take something. Yet, there may still be value here.
It has been a long time since I thought of myself as, or referred to myself as, a witch. I just remember many years ago having to come to terms with that word and to be comfortable with it. Nothing more came of it then. It was just acknowledging I am a witch and that is okay.
In my trip to the US recently, among other things, I started to make real connections with or deepened connections with several of my nieces and nephews, who are now adults. This really was a new piece to my travel. There was one niece I did not get to see, and as it happened, we chose to make time to talk on the phone after I was home. It was brilliant. We both remembered a conversation we had when she was much younger. As I remember it, it was the first time my sister (her mom) and my mom were able to hear what I was saying / doing. I thought that meant they had softened a bit, less fear, and might be more comfortable with it all. I was surprised they never came to me to ask more questions as I had thought they might. Silly me. My niece’s memory was being asked afterwards lots of questions about what Aunt Mary / Marybeth was talking about! Poor child. She was open while we talked, but honestly, in the energy of it, many people really are and I understand (but consistently forget) it is hard to hold after the conversation is over. As she said about it now was, “I really didn’t know how to answer their questions because I didn’t really know what you were doing. But I did know it wasn’t like you were a witch.” Yes, so I did at this stage need within me to gently correct that. The way she meant it was correct, within her definition of a witch.
It was a bit of on / off, start / stop energy, but this past Friday I found myself in a gathering of four women, two friends from Astrology classes and one the mentor of one of them. We were gathering to explore some asteroids from an astrology perspective on goddess energy, dark moon goddess in particular. And it was proclaimed, very simply, very matter-of-factly at the beginning that this was our first coven, a coven being a gathering of witches.
In the last couple days, I have understood more about magic as it has been passed down. I understand more about myself and how I “naturally” do things. I quote naturally because I have no idea what natural is or what I have picked up over the years from all of the books I have read and people I have talked to. Funny slip there – I almost said books I have written.
Yes, I will start to write.
Last Thursday, I did a video conversation with Rick and Peter, Peter being someone Rick met at the last event held at our home. Peter is looking to create videos to put up on You Tube – my words – to assist those waking up now, to uplift, to inspire. Rick and I agreed to give it a shot, have a conversation while being recorded. It went well. Rick mentioned my Perfection and Ease concept / vibration. I did not get to respond to that or say anything myself. The conversation went many different directions. But after, Rick suggested for the next one, we come up with a theme. And Peter suggested if any of us had any ideas, like if Marybeth had an idea in the next two weeks, she could voice it. And wow, fine, okay I said it. I already knew we needed to do one (or more) on Perfection and Ease. It is so ready. The venue may be perfect. And if I speak it, I will have it recorded to put into book format. If it is something that wants to be heard, this gives an avenue to finally do it. I recognize I am very slow. I recognize I need a lot of help to move forward in things. And I recognize I have so much support to get from the, I will call it thought level, but that is not accurate, to the writing or speaking level. I knew it in me. But those I lose and they don’t always come out. That is one of the reasons I write here, to pull things through. And immediately both of them made statements that made it super easy to say what I was thinking. Life is good.
Also lots going on internally. I need to and am finding ways to go deeper into me. I may have said this earlier because it has been with me for a while, but best words I have is I need to / want to go out in a desert or sit under a Buddha tree … for as long as it takes. To do what, I do not know. But something is birthing through me now, and this attention will assist the labor and delivery. Rick has noticed this also in me, and we talked last night about how to create that. We have decided to take three nights away with my purpose being to go within, and Rick’s purpose to hold the space for me (to drive, to interface with people, to get food.) Lots of energy exploring possibilities, places to go, and in the asking for assistance as opposed to taking a weekend away by myself. This morning, I was seeing similarities to experiences written about in the Atlantean Secrets and the Anna books. One of the people whom I have worked with in the past two years also described something like this for me in doing certain work – that I will need someone to hold the perimeter, like a guard so that I do not get pulled back before I am ready.
As you know, Rick and I hold these group sessions for people who want to come do more work / play with us. We meet every other week. We took a short break while in the US and we both felt something was going to change in what comes through. And it has in a way. But this morning, I was seeing there is an opportunity for something to change around me and what I bring directly to the group. The “thoughts” have landed two times today. I see these are what I want to listen to. I will look to bring that through, at least to offer it to the group.
Blessings and love to you from me 🙂