I will share part of what I wrote yesterday. I am not sure it makes sense in words yet, but these were just written for me, in my journal. And, I remember the newness of the thoughts in the meditation of two days ago, pretty solid already by yesterday, and today it just seems obvious to me.
Day 7. Yesterday after writing on opening to the Order of the Magi, I did my meditation with Rick. What I saw in that meditational space is that the connection to all, to everything, to every being, is with me, around me, within me all the time. When I put attention on an aspect of it, my attention draws it to me. I had, earlier in the day yesterday, commented out loud to Rick the geometry or symbol we were going to put in the centerpiece of the labyrinth. I showed him the crop circle picture that has remained as my computer screen picture for a good number of years. And then I showed him the symbol of the Order of the Magi that I have drawn on my reMarkable tablet. I knew they were basically the same, but in that moment, I saw the positioning of the three petals was exact in both pictures. So, it is me that resonates with them. I felt that moment, and I felt that geometry long enough to name it and to want to put it in our landscaping. They are with me because I called to them, not because they have a message to tell me or something they want me to do. In that same moment, I saw and heard this has happened many times before. I think a nonphysical being shows up in my life and therefore it has meaning, but they often suggest it is I that have called them forth. I just did not see their pointing at those times because it was not a mental thought to call them in. During the meditation, I started to change my story, change the way I see this life. I don’t know if I have explained it well, but I think it will provide a profound shift in how I experience life. I am consciously changing my story. I am now looking more closely at what interests me, what draws my attention. I am now asking what it is that I want when someone shows up, for they have answered my calling. I do always laugh that it still always comes back to “What do you want, Marybeth?” Such a funny part of my existence, maybe everyone’s, I do not know.